Continuing Prenatal Acupuncture, End of Prescription Hormones, First Visit with GP Specializing in Maternity, and Nine Weeks Pregnant

Current mood . . .

This week has been difficult. While I was initially thrilled after the ultrasound, my doubts about whether or not the fetus would survive resurfaced very quickly. I keep worrying about if I'll make it through the first trimester (I'm 3/4 through now), if I'll make it through the second trimester, if the baby will survive to birth, and then if it will survive after that. Having the miscarriage was very traumatizing and it's still fresh in my memory having only happened five month ago. Also, my husband has been away for work and the cat is not the greatest confidant for my fears.

The weather reflecting my mood.

I wondered if my oscillating moods that seemed to be going distinctly dark were due to the prescription hormones, the pregnancy, my dropping lithium level, the uncertainty and anxiety associated with pregnancy especially after fertility treatments and having a history of miscarriage, or a combination of all of the above. But my perinatal psychiatrist had clearly directed me not assess my mood until after I came off of the prescription hormones, because they were no doubt impacting my mood and making me more nauseous, so adding extra lithium while on them would likely make me intolerably nauseous.

The cat did not enjoy his bath, but he had a rash and was all itchy, so it had to be done (it was awful without a second person to help- the cat's like a 50 pound Coho in a river thrashing around as if his life depended upon it.)

I had my weekly acupuncture appointment on Wednesday. Stephanie at Elements of Health put needles into my lower legs, one in my very upper stomach, into my neck and shoulders for neck and shoulder tension I've been having, and several into my head. She again put a tack into each inner forearm for nausea. I put Band-Aids over these and still have both of them in. I can't tell if they do help my nausea or not, but I certainly don't want it to get any worse, so out of an abundance of caution, I'll take them thank you very much. My insurance coverage for acupuncture ran out a couple of sessions ago. All subsequent visits (after the first one) are $85.00 each. I keep wondering how long I should keep going for. I know that all paramedical professionals will try to get you to go indefinitely, but when does cost outweigh benefit? I'm just not sure and really don't want to risk losing this $15,000 plus pregnancy. A second miscarriage this year would destroy me. Plus the thought of going through even an abbreviated version of this, getting a frozen embryo transfer, does not appeal to me at all.

Before acupuncture on the table.

During acupuncture, note the needles in the head, in my neck and on my shoulders (some are hard to see).

After acupuncture.

Yesterday was my last day on prescription hormones. The dispensary at the Victoria Fertility Centre seems to have miscounted the Endometrin I required, because I was short one yesterday. My nurse coordinator assured me that missing the last Endometrin in the evening was okay, so I didn't have to drive all the way out there thankfully. My last Estrace was with dinner last night. It felt strange this morning not taking an Estrace with breakfast and inserting an Endometrin after my shower (not complaining, just saying it's a change of routine). I worry about whether or not the end of the hormones will cause my pregnancy to end. I know that some women are on them until 12 weeks, but other women have no prescription hormones at all and their pregnancies succeed, so I just have to stop worrying. It's not like there's anything I can do about it at this point. I've done everything I possibly could. But waiting and living with this uncertainty is agonizing. I have not noticed any withdrawal type symptoms, but it's tough to tell what is what when my body is constantly changing and topsy turvy from pregnancy. I'm just hoping that not having an extra helping of progesterone and estradiol will make me feel somewhat less awful.

The last Endometrin!

Almost three months of different hormones comes to an end. I will miss the effervescence though. Not!

Today, I am exactly nine weeks pregnant. According to sites that compare fetuses (yes the embryo apparently crossed over into fetus territory today) to fruit, the fetus is the size of a cherry this week. I'm feeling pretty nauseous, have a horrible headache as usual, and I'm totally exhausted today even after 10 hours of sleep.

I'm exhausted after ten hours of sleep. Am I becoming a cat?

Also today, I met with the GP who will be covering my pregnancy, Dr. Hugh Down (my own GP does not do maternity care). He was my sister's maternity doctor and she recommended him highly. I can see why now that I've met him. His MOA took a urine sample from me upon arriving (okay I gave it to her, she didn't take it with force or anything) to test for glucose levels, etc. and I gave her the chart materials that Dr. Hudson had given me to give to Dr. Down. Since Dr. Hudson had already done so many blood tests, that didn't seem to be required. The MOA took me into an exam room and weighed me before the doctor arrived.

The colours of the wall could only mean one thing, I'm in a doctor's office . . .

Dr. Down asked me standard questions about allergies, past surgeries, current medications and medical conditions, and discussed testing that could be done in the second trimester to determine genetic abnormalities (from the $500 test not covered by the public system that Dr. Hudson likes down to the less reliable publicly funded test). He let me ask the questions I had about whether or not I could do anything for my very sore throat other than gargle with salt and take the occasional Tylenol (better not to take any other medications since nothing is proven safe in pregnancy, especially in first trimester when everything is forming), if I could go back to the chiropractor (my neck and shoulders are so tense that my right jaw is hurting- he says as long as the chiropractor is not really rough and you let them know you're pregnant then it's fine)), and if it was true that my weight lifting would be limited to 15 pounds during pregnancy (it seems this is the case since I could be risking hernias etc., so I guess the 40 pound medicine ball will be lonely for a while). He took a lot of time with me and was very kind, funny, and knowledgeable (he even knew what pseudocholinesterase deficiency is which not all doctors do, so I was impressed). He says that he'll see me again in about one month.

The lilies in the bouquet that my parents in law gave me when they surprised us with a visit last weekend smell divine. I clipped the anthers off because lily pollen (and other parts of the lily as well)  is deadly to cats and  can cause kidney failure. Fortunately, this is one smell that I can tolerate in pregnancy.

My husband is back late tonight for one day before he leaves again, so he can spend time with me, the cat, and the cherry.

The cat is preparing for his father's return by practising his cutest poses.